putting down or building up?
Last week I was in a local book store, picking up a few books for my daughter to consume during a weekend trip to visit our family. 6+ hours each way, >> this mom << can only handle so much of the road-trip interrogation.
While I was debating on a particular couple of books I thought she'd enjoy I saw an interaction that both shocked me and broke my heart.
A mother took a book out of her approximately 10 year old daughters hands, then proceeded to berate her:
"The reason your brother can read these books is because his IQ is SO MUCH HIGHER than yours. He's so CRAZY insanely smart he can understand these books. You just can't. You need to go pick out a book that's at your grade-level."
I watched the expression on that little girls face go from excitement to devastation .
Now, we can go around in circles on whether or not this mom was correct in that the book was beyond her. That is a separate issue.
The problem is that she didn't give her daughter hope. Her brother is placed on a pedestal far above her. She could have said so many other things about why she couldn't have that book yet, and not crush her spirit.
The little girl was given to occasion to rise to. No challenge to achieve. No future except that one day she'll be older and then maybe....
There is a commercial on TV right now Samsung is putting out - the tagline is
"Do what you can't."
As cheesy as it is, I love it so. It's what I hope my daughter sees. Do what you can't. Do what is "too hard" make it over the mountains and hurdles. Through the mud and unseen struggles.